Searching for my Happily Ever After.

Today was dreadful. I went downstairs at about 10 and Mum and Dad and I talked for forever about me doing homework. I said "Okay, I'll go right now and get on with it because, yes, it is a problem and, yes, it is my fault." So I went over to the dining table, coursework in hand, and proceeded to get on with it. Now, the problems came when I got stuck on the correct spelling of tagliatelle. I asked Mum, who was in the kitchen right next to the dining room, how to spell it. No answer. "Mum?" No answer. "MUUUUUMMM!!!!" No answer, and I heard her storm off upstairs. What have I done now?! I followed her shortly after. "Mum?" She was by the window, with her back to me. "Hey, Mum? How do you spell tagliatelle?" No reply. Well sod YOU, then! I went swiftly downstairs and tried to get on with my work. About 5 minutes later she came down with a piece of paper with the correct spelling written on it.

She said coldly, "If you have any more inquiries, go ask the kitchen cupboard!" And slammed down a packet of tagliatelle onto the table. I was rather confused, upset and angry.

We had yet another argument, there's too many arguments around at the moment, we need an exterminator or something because I think that we have an infestation. This one was probably sparked off by Mum mumbling that I was pathetic and didn't ever do any work. I ended up screaming at her "WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M DOING?! I'M DOING THE WORK RIGHT NOW! YOU DON'T THINK I CAN DO ANYTHING, DO YOU? YOU THINK I'M USELESS!" u.s.w.

Well eventually after much shouting I broke down into tears, did about a sentence more of work, then gave up, wrote a note to Mum, and walked right out the door with a fiver in my shoe (I had no pockets). That was about 12. I wandered around looking for somewhere completely rural but didn't find anywhere. I was gone about 2 or three hours before I decided to come back. I was greeted by Mum crying and she gave me a great big hug and told me that she loved me.

All was well again and I did my homework until about 6.

But just now she got all bitchy and said that I hate her and I always shout at her. I was very confused and very hurt. Why does she just pick fights for no reason whatsoever? What have done THIS TIME to make her just blow at me?

That was my bad today.

I have just been reading everyone elses diaries. This one thing that Emma wrote made my burst out in hysterical laughter for about 2 minutes.

"had a revolutionary moment 2day in chemistry, 4 a few seconds i looked at the leightonater and thought- "what am i scared of" hes just a lil man who has a strange love 4 chemistry, y do get sweaty palms and feel nervous in his lessons?? i thought either im in love with him or i have a problem, yes i agree that if i was in love with him that is the equvilent of a having a problem but thats beside the point"

Hilarious.

Also, something that Elizabeth wrote. There is no happily ever after. She is right. I'd love to think that there is, but there won't be for me.

Kim xx